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Post by kaijafon on Dec 30, 2011 23:23:45 GMT -6
good story. hope you continue it.
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Post by jtpatriot on Dec 31, 2011 11:25:59 GMT -6
I really enjoy this story. I'm glad the Doc is with him. Think I'd be looking for a large storage tank (tanks) for fuel. Maybe he'll find a fuel tanker. Got food, shelter, and a pretty girl, life is good. But wait, who is that dude on the bike?
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Post by mnn2300 on Dec 31, 2011 16:11:31 GMT -6
Chapter 13
Mark got the roadblock cleared enough to get the trucks through, he walked back to the truck Jessie was driving and made sure she was ok, then they both headed out. Once back at the Johansson's where they were putting in the garden Mark pulled the truck into the far end of the clearing while Jessica waited at the driveway.
"You going with me to pick up the trailer?" Mark asked. "No, you're going to drop me off at home so I can use the bathroom and then pick me up when you're done." Jessica replied. "I'm sorry, I just can't handle dead bodies right now, I saw the Guard collect too many of them."
"It's ok, I should be back in half hour or 45 minutes." He kissed her then watched until she got safely into the house. It took him almost exactly 30 minutes to get the trailer hooked up and drive back home, he used the restroom before they left again for the Jackson lumber yard. Back at the lumber yard, Mark and Jessica loaded up the rest of the brick they needed and then put pallets of top soil on the truck to fill it. He also drove one of the forklifts onto the landscapers trailer to use back at the house unloading the trucks, they were back at home with the truck and forklift in under two hours.
Mark unloaded the forklift from the trailer and then started unloading the trucks
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Post by rvm45 on Jan 1, 2012 4:25:54 GMT -6
You posted the story where the lady Vet appeared 29Dec; yet there on 30 Dec I was writing that I hoped she didn't reappear. I must have missed your next to last entry somehow--it would have been the last at that point in time..... O well..... .....RVM45
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Post by nancy1340 on Jan 1, 2012 11:48:30 GMT -6
Thanks
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Post by mnn2300 on Jan 1, 2012 13:01:25 GMT -6
You posted the story where the lady Vet appeared 29Dec; yet there on 30 Dec I was writing that I hoped she didn't reappear. I must have missed your next to last entry somehow--it would have been the last at that point in time..... O well..... .....RVM45 I just figured you wanted me to kill her off
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Post by mnn2300 on Jan 1, 2012 14:05:03 GMT -6
Chapter 14
Jessica signaled Mark to stop the forklift, when he turned the engine off he heard the heavy bass sound of a cars stereo system playing way to loud with the type of booming that you not only heard but also felt.
The music was getting louder, headed this way, a heavily chromed Black SUV someone had turned into a low rider turned into the driveway, it had the kind of hubcaps that kept spinning even though the wheels had stopped.
Three people got out, two guys and a girl. The driver was wearing a leather jacket even though the temps were in the 80’s, the girl that had been sitting next to him was wearing big boots, tight jeans and a jean jacket with the arms cut off and lots of 'look at me' jewelry, the guy in the back seat wearing torn jeans and a muscle shirt displaying 2 arms full of tattoos.
“What are you doing at my house?” the girl asked. “Excuse me?” Mark said. “This house is my parent’s house, I assume they are dead so it’s mine now, what do you think you’re doing?” she said. “How do we know the people who lived here were your parents?” Jessica asked after only two sentences she was quickly getting tired of the girl’s attitude. Jessica notice that the guy that had been in the back seat was checking her out, she crossed her arms over her chest and looked away. “What? You’re questioning me? Get the Hell off my property!” the girl screamed. “Now let’s slow down a…….” Mark started “The lady asked you to leave.” The driver said, pulling a pistol from somewhere under his leather coat, Mark saw the other guy now had a gun out also.
Suddenly two shots rang out and both men fell to the ground. Jessica screamed and dropped into a crouch trying to figure out what happened. Mark finally pulled his pistol as the girl was trying to pull a pistol out of her boots, another shot rang out and she dropped to the ground also, blood spurting out of a hole in her chest. Mark, bewildered was frantically looking around trying to find out who was shooting.
Mark grabbed Jessica and pulled her into a crouch at the side of the truck, looking around with his gun in his hand. They saw a man in camo walk slowly out the front door of the house across the road with his hands in front of him "Don't shoot, I'm a friend." He hollered slowly walking towards the couple, arms extended in front of him, palms towards the couple.
"Who are you?" Mark yelled covering him with his handgun as he got closer.
"Sgt Robert Quinn, Army Rangers, retired and the guy that just saved your ass." Quinn said offering his hand to shake. Without even thinking Mark holstered his gun and shook Quinn’s hand, which is what Quinn wanted, diffusing a situation is what his old instructor called it. Everything has just gone to shit, the bad guys are dead but you’ve got some scared bystanders so you do something totally normal to diffuse the situation, worked 99 times out of 100 and did this time too.
“Mark, Mark Larson.” Mark said shaking Quinn’s hand “and this is Dr. Jessica Martin” she was under control just enough to hold her hand out but barely.
“Doctor? Pleased to meet you.” Quinn said, shaking her hand.
Tears were still flowing but Quinn could see a bit of control coming back. “I’m a veterinarian not a medical doctor.” She said “how…. Why…” Quinn could see the control fading.” Doc, you want to sit on the tailgate?” he said, pointing to their pickup, she nodded her head and Mark guided her over to it, he grabbed a bottle of water from a cooler on the bed of the pickup and handed it to her.
Quinn started talking. “I heard you at the lumber yard in Jackson earlier and frankly you're the first people I’ve seen alive since I made it home, however being a former Army Ranger, I’m a bit suspicious of people, so I followed you, spotted where you turned off the highway and tried to see what kind of people you were, if there were others, stuff like that. I holed up in the house across the road to watch and when the dirt-bags showed up; I couldn’t hear what was going on but when they pulled their guns on you I decided I’d rather have you two as neighbors than the three of them. How did they find you and what did they want?
“Supposedly the woman was the daughter of the people that owned this place.” Mark said. “I’d never met her and the few times the owners talked about their daughter it was not with their approval.” “With the type of guys she was traveling with I can imagine.” Quinn said. Jessica was staring at the bodies and Quinn recognized the look, seen it from youngsters in the Army after their first battle. Staring at the bodies wasn’t helping her.
"Let's move away from here, perhaps go inside" Quinn told the two. "Certainly" Mark said, putting his arm around Jessica. The two led Quinn down the path away from the earth sheltered home, a couple minutes Quinn saw a cabin in the clearing.
When they got to the house, Quinn let their dog Suzie sniff him first and she approved. "Would you like some coffee Sergeant?" Mark asked. "I'd love some and you can call me Quinn." Quinn told him. "Thanks for saving our hides out there Quinn, we're grateful." Mark said handing him a cup of coffee. Away from the bodies, Jessica was starting to relax. Suzie, had her head in Jessica's lap and Jessie was rubbing her. It was a calming move for Jessica.
- - -
"So what's your story Quinn, how'd you survive?" Mark asked.
“I was in the Army for 20 years, the last 12 as a Ranger. I decided to muster out and was at a base in TX for my last two months after getting back from the Middle East. When the quarantine hit we were called out to the Dallas area to help keep things in order. That didn’t work too well, hard to control 3 million scared people, things went south fast there, dead piling up, people looting, the flu hitting the base hard, finally most everyone was dead, we tried burying people but it just got to b e too much near the end.” Quinn had a far off stare in his eyes at that point and paused for a minute.
“Anyway I decided my enlistment was over and headed out to come back here. Ran into a few people, a couple from Dallas heading back home to northern California, we traveled together for a while, found some kids near Kansas City, they ended up going with the couple from Texas when we split up. I got back here a couple weeks ago, buried Grandma and Grandpa, both had died from E2 at some point, been staying at the farm outside Jackson taking care of things since. I was at the lumber yard when you were getting brick. Decided to see who you were, what kind of folks you were so I followed you and was watching from the house across from your new garden when the dirtbag’s showed up." Quinn finished.
“We’re sure glad you did, you were in for "20 years? you don't look that old." Jessica said. "I joined the day I turned 18, I'm 38 now Doctor" Quinn said. "Please call me Jessica or Jessie." Jessica said. "Yes ma'am, err Jessie." Quinn said.
- - -
"Anyone alive in Jackson?" Mark asked. "Not that I've seen, how about around here?" Quinn asked. "Just the two of us, do you drive a black pick-up?" Mark asked. "No, why?" Quinn asked "Saw one a few days back heading south out of Avery, by the time I got in my truck they were gone, but they were headed towards Jackson, of course, there are lots of turnoffs between here and there too." Mark replied. Quinn asked about their survival and Mark and Jessica both filled him in, Jessica was loosening up.
They talked for about an hour, Quinn said he should be going, had his afternoon chores to do “Mark, I’ll dispose of the bodies, and head home, I assume you don't want that fancy vehicle they were driving?." Quinn said. "No, do you?" Mark asked. "God, no, what they did to an SUV is downright disrespectful to motor vehicles, I was going to get rid of it when I got rid of the bodies." Quinn said. "I'll help you load the bodies." Mark said. "No need, I really can handle it on my own." Quinn replied.
"Quinn, would you at least let us thank you with dinner?" Jessie asked. "I'd like that but not tonight, I really do have chores I have to get back to." Quinn replied. "How about Sunday then? 5:00?" Jessica asked. "OK, only one problem, I have no idea what day of the week it is to be able to tell when Sunday is." Quinn replied. "Its Thursday today." Mark said. "OK, Sunday, 5PM, I'll be here." Quinn answered and then walked out, Mark followed.
Mark followed him outside and shook his hand and thanked him again. "You sure you don't need help with the bodies?" he asked.
"No, just go in and take care of your woman, she looked close to being in shock when it happened and then was relaxing but when I mentioned disposing of the bodies, she tensed up again, just spend the afternoon with her. see you Sunday." Quinn said turning and walking down the path.
Mark watched him for a minute and then went back into the house. Jessie was in the kitchen rinsing dishes, tears were rolling down her cheeks. Mark put his arms around her and felt her trembling. "It's ok, we're safe now, we're safe." He said kissing her "We're going to be ok."
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Post by mnn2300 on Jan 1, 2012 14:11:42 GMT -6
So, this is the end of Book 1 of this story. I hope you enjoyed it.
As I said back in the first post on this story thread, book two is just some thoughts in the back of my head so far, but there are plenty of stories that can come out of this scenario. Mark and Jessica's story isn't anywhere near over and Quinn's is just starting, plus there's the mysterious black pick-up.
I need to work on my main story (Vanished) for a while before I revisit this one. Vanished is at 65,000+ words right now and am hoping it will be double that when done. I also have the first 2 chapters of Vanished's sequel started along with notes for more, just because it popped into my head while writing.
My brain usually has 2 or 3 stories going at once and I kind of work on one til I get stuck and then move on to another, eventually coming back to the first. Possibly because I discovered my writing ability later in life, or maybe my brains just miswired.
In any event, comments are always welcome and I hope you enjoyed the story.
OHH and promote this board, we need more writers and readers and if you have a story idea, give it a try, even if you've never done it before, you may surprise yourself.
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Post by patience on Jan 1, 2012 18:42:14 GMT -6
I loved it! Waiting anxiously for Part II. It's refreshing to read one where the main characters are average people. There are things to be learned from the "Super-Prepper" tales, too, but after several of those, this hits the spot. You write well, and present realistic characters and a believable scenario. The location gives the probability that there wouldn't be too many problem people around, yet that puts our characters pretty much on their own from here on. I think you have created an excellent basis for part 2. I'm anxious to see where this goes.
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Post by nancy1340 on Jan 1, 2012 22:43:00 GMT -6
Enjoying this story very much. Thank you.
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Post by shortydawkins on Jan 20, 2012 2:04:22 GMT -6
I like this a lot. Excellent characterization. Mark is real. He is very human. The situations are real. Very good.
Shorty Dawkins
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Post by shortydawkins on Jan 20, 2012 2:09:22 GMT -6
My brain usually has 2 or 3 stories going at once and I kind of work on one til I get stuck and then move on to another, eventually coming back to the first. Possibly because I discovered my writing ability later in life, or maybe my brains just miswired. This seems to be the case with most writers. I have the same problem. Other writers I have known say the same. I find occasionally I have nothing in my head, but then it all comes flooding in from several directions. Shorty Dawkins
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Post by guncat on Feb 11, 2012 18:08:02 GMT -6
Real good story, nice to read about someone using their wits and will to survive.
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Post by teedee on Mar 8, 2012 21:15:37 GMT -6
Very nicely done. I also like that the main characters were not preppers. I liked the scene where he thought to get some spices to make the food taste good. Thanks and I look forward to more.
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Post by nancy1340 on Mar 8, 2012 22:56:28 GMT -6
Sighhhhhh I thought maybe we had a new chapter.......
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Post by shannaredwind on Mar 20, 2012 10:40:07 GMT -6
Just read this. Very good story.
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Post by mnn2300 on Mar 20, 2012 17:47:03 GMT -6
Thank you all. I am working on book 2 of this series along with 3 other stories so its going very slowly, not to mention; work, family. church and just life in general. The good news is only 11 more years til retirement, then maybe I'll have time to write. lol I wish I wrote faster but I just don't.
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Post by idahobob on Mar 24, 2012 12:29:36 GMT -6
Just got caught up in the story.
It is a very good one. The characters seem very real and it is not your typical PAW story where everyone is a extremely well equipped survivalist.
Cant' wait for more.
Thanks,
Bob III
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Post by wisetioga on Jun 30, 2012 23:19:35 GMT -6
mnn2300
Great story, I enjoyed it very much and am looking fprward to Book 2. Read your previous story "Powers Out" and enjoyed thal very much also. By the way don't let these folks who have a problem with something that you wrote bother you. You're a good writer and most importantly it's your story and you will write what you felt in your heart/heard in your head/have planned out in your notes/etc. and tha's as it should be.
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Post by freebirde on Jul 26, 2012 16:37:32 GMT -6
I just read it, very good! I too have the problem of having a couple of stories in my head at one time. My stories are pretty wide range, which is good so that I don't get them mixed up, much.
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Post by mnn2300 on Dec 13, 2012 9:55:21 GMT -6
In my writing Quinn’s story, I decided to make a change in his background. This will allow me to tie a couple of stories together, and really doesn't change the already written story here in any meaningful way. It’s in Chapter 14 of the story in this thread: ‘Get Busy Living” . The New section starts at:
So you don't have to go hunting for it, here is the re-written part
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Post by hardtrailz on Dec 14, 2012 10:45:02 GMT -6
Thank You!
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Post by jerngen on Dec 5, 2013 20:51:01 GMT -6
I enjoyed it. Now to find the other parts and read them.
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Post by admin on Jan 25, 2014 18:29:00 GMT -6
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Post by urbonangel on May 29, 2015 3:43:59 GMT -6
Great story. Thanks for sharing!
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