What if rescue services were commercial and advertised?

[papaof2]

What if the fire, National Guard, whatever rescue services weren't available?  What would the ads for the commercial rescue services look like?  What music would accompany their radio ads?  What images for the TV ads?  What would their web pages look like?  Here's a sample print ad:

Noah's Commercial Rescue Service

Tornado? Hurricane? Flood?

Call our 24/7 emergency number any time, day or night:

1-800-NOAHSBOAT

As soon as we verify your minimum of $5,000 line of credit, we'll dispatch a fast ambulance or boat (helicopter requires $10,000 line of credit) for a safe, speedy rescue. All rescue personnel are First Aid, CPR and AED trained. Even if they don't get there in time, they will try to resuscitate you. Resuscitations for additional people are $2,000 each. Additional resuscitation attempts on the same person are $1,500 each. Maximum of $12,000 per person or credit/debit card limit if credit/debit card signatory is present and signs override. Greater than credit/debit card limit requires loan form UB1N-HAD and witness signature.

Remember, call 1-800-NOAHSBOAT

[freebirde]

Reminds me of a movie from '76, 'Mother, Jugs, and Speed". videoeta.com/items/20091

[willc453]

Thought about your pay for rescue/security services. Maybe a flat monthly fee with X amount of calls being available for these services. Of course, these services would be required to have and met an specific response time. Waiting for security to show up 20 minutes plus while your house is being broken into, isn't going to make it. Like Triple A does with their road side service. You have the basic plan, then there's the expanded one. Had the basic for many years which was 3 tows/road assistance like getting a jump for your car battery for one year. I rarely used it, but one time I used all 3 up helping my aunt/cousin out. Got the extended version for about $40 or so more a year, but instead of a 5(?) mile tow radius, it's now 100. Also, I can have 5 gallons of gas delivered for free. Still haven't used it, but makes me feel better if I do break down somewhere, a hundred miles should take me to the nearest town. And who says I can't use all 3 tows in 1 day for a range of 300 miles? Also, anyone remember the tv show Thunderbirds with puppets and the ah so cool props? The leader/father of all the boys is a multimillionaire...but wondered if he ever got any compensation from any government for all these rescues.

[ydderf2]

The last time I was in Thailand ambulances were private I never checked any of the other emergency services.